And I am sad. I guess a grieving process is normal. I woke up without malice, completely accepting of the whole crappy year I have had, and then that is when the Universe offered another door. That tends to be how it works, I suppose. I am not thrilled about working until 4:30 next year. I probably won't be able to tutor. I haven't had much luck in getting online jobs-which sucks, because I LOVE working online. When I volunteered to change jobs, I overlooked those little things. Oh well. What's done is done. I would rather make decisions quickly because I AGONIZE over them otherwise, and I still second-guess myself. So why not just make a quick rational decision and deal with the emotional fallout later, because it will happen regardless.
A new school. New people. A new job. I am a bit nervous. I want to start NOW so I am not too overwhelmed when the kids show up. I am sad that I didn't make a bigger impact at Hickory. I may just be a back-of-the-room, behind the scenes kind of person. I kind of hate that. That isn't who I want to be, but alas social anxiety.
I am still praying for an online job for evenings and weekends, and I will also do tutoring, but if not, I'll figure something out.
Looking forward. I will be happy when everything is official and I can get into my room and work.
The loneliness is pressing in tonight. It will be okay.
